Creating your own, "Yes Day"
Kids aren't the only ones who like "yes days", a day when all of your reasonable wishes come true, but when you ask an adult what they would do with a "yes day", they often have difficulty coming up with an answer. This is especially true for people have suffered from chronic and debilitating depression, which can rob people of their sense of joy. I wrote this experiment for anyone who needs help designing their own "yes day".
First, imagine that you are spending two nights and one full day at a beautiful spa. The evening of your arrival, you are met at the door by a concierge who will take down a list of everything you would like to do the following day. Nothing is too big or too small an activity. This spa has every type of studio space imaginable for any type of art, woodworking, sport, game, etc. They are located next to mountains, rivers, and the ocean. They have massage therapists, reiki therapists, acupuncture and any other type of therapy that you have ever enjoyed having done. They offer fine dining and picnic lunches. The only catch is that you will just be there for one full day, so everything you would like to do needs to fit into that one day.
Here is my list:
- Wake up to coffee and breakfast on my back porch
- Bring a picnic lunch on a mountain hike
- Return home for some gentle yoga and meditation
- Receive a relaxing massage
- Time to curl up in my chair with a nice book
- A nice evening meal followed by a stroll on the beach
- Relaxing in a nice big bubble bath before bed
But that's my list of activities, now it's your turn to make your list. Go ahead and write your list of activities that you would like to do on your own "yes day".
After you have completed that list, make a list of things you do on a typical day (you can decide if you want to do a work day or a free day). Once you have both of your lists completed, come back to read the rest of this blog.
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Now that you have written your lists of activities that you would like to do on a "yes day" and things you typically do in a day, get a pair of scissors and cut out each item on your lists. You will now have bits of paper with one activity on each paper. Mix the activities together and then spread them out upright in front of you.
From here, you can create a new type of day. This is the day that includes the things you normally do and need to do, and the things you would like to do on your "yes day". You likely won't be able to include everything you need to do everyday, nor will you be able to include everything from your "yes day". You can move the bits of paper around to rearrange your schedule, noticing how it feels, and then rearrange again.
As you play with your schedule, incorporating some of the things that need to get done and some of the things from your "yes day", notice which arrangements fill you with a sense of possibility. Notice which arrangements feel especially playful. Is there an arrangement that feels risky? This is good information gathering. Consider what your emotions might be telling you.
Continue to arrange your days and your activities until you have a day you would like to implement. You may feel as though you're only able to include one "yes day" item into your normal routine, and that's ok. You may notice that it's easier to include time for that writing project you've been wanting to do if you write for 15 minutes while having your morning coffee instead of watching the news.
You can repeat this activity as often as you would like, noticing what it feels like to create more space in your life for whatever brings you joy. Once you get into the practice of creating possibility, you may start to notice that there are other things in your life that are possible as well. You may find that you are ready to say, "yes", to something you have been saying, "no", to.
